Interested or Interesting

I recently stumbled across a United States survey conducted in 2021 that discovered that 12% of adults had no close friends.  This same study found that of those who did have a close friend group, their number of friends were significantly decreasing year after year.  My first instinct was that the COVID lockdowns clearly impacted these responses. However, once I dug deeper, I found that this trend has been worsening since the early 1990s.  A core human drive for each and every one of us is to create meaningful relationships in our lives.  So, if these statics are true, no wonder much of our society is experiencing increased levels of loneliness and depression.  Fortunately, I think the answer may be quite simple.

20 years ago when I first ventured into business networking to help grow my small business, I received an invaluable piece of advice from a mentor.  She said, "Don't get overwhelmed with everything there is to learn.  You simply need to remember one thing.  Be Interested, not Interesting."  WOW!  There's so much power in that short little phrase.  From that moment forward, I kept that phrase in the forefront of my mind for every personal interaction.  In today's click and swipe world, it's easy for all of us to fall into the trap of trying to keep up with the Jones, and trying to impress everyone around us.  Unfortunately, that's not how meaningful relationships start.  The best relationships, both personal and professional, normally begin with someone showing authentic interest in someone else.

If you're one of those people who find it difficult to make friends, or you struggle to create professional relationships, this may be a great first step forward.  Whether you're entering the dating scene, trying to fit in at your new company or rekindling old relationships, it's time to flip these survey stats.  People will always love talking about their favorite subject......themselves!  So, get curious, seek to learn what makes them tick and you'll quickly discover how easy it is to build deep connections in your life.

What questions can you start using today to show others that you're truly interested, not interesting?